The Wedding

25 Oct

June 2013 – – This past weekend I flew into Massachusetts for a wedding. Three days, three nights, and a whirlwind of catching up with whoever I could. Not all the stories are notable to anyone outside myself and the rag tag circle of friends I spent my time with, but I do want to chronicle the wedding experience.

After seeing my parents off to Newfoundland, a shower, and throwing all the things I would need for the day in a bag, my good friend from high school, Red Sox Cowboy met me at my house and we were off. Mi encantadora had called me earlier in the day and asked if I would mind lending a hand setting up. Of course I said yes because I love her and I would bend over backwards for just about any of my friends. The problem was that she didn’t give me a time so I just planned to leave around one and be up there five hours early. As I am getting ready, she texts me to tell me they are at the reception hall. Crap! I tell her I’ll get there as soon as possible, but I hadn’t left yet.

RSCowboy arrives, we head up and after several reroutes because my GPS could find a way around a bridge that was out, stupid thing, we finally get there…but no one is there. Fail number one. The wedding wasn’t stating until 7 so RSCowboy and I decided to go pregame a bit at Chilis then grab a bottle of vodka and head to the beach. That killed almost enough time and after driving around (to use a How I Met Your Mother reference) eating a sandwich, we got to the church with plenty of time to change and be ready for the ceremony.

Only the ceremony started at 5:30 and we were an hour late. Fail number two.

Running into the church, not entirely sober, dressed in short shorts and a tshirt, clearly not my finest moment. Not to mention I met former coworkers in the paring lot who were extremely confused about my attire. After beelining it to the bathroom, changing so fast I almost fell over more than once, and doing my best to make sure my make up didn’t look whore-ish, we went to the reception sight and as inconspicuously as possible found seats. 

The reception was a blur. Between the alcohol I began consuming to quell my nerves and embarrassment, and the trips to the parking lot with old friends to have a couple more…sandwiches…I am surprised I was upright. 

Have I mentioned I don’t do weddings?

Regardless, it was nice catching up with everyone, and even nicer to see the bride and her sketch-ball hubby finally tie the knot (I mean they’d been dating for like a million years…or seven…same dif). I did leave the shin dig with all of my belongings, a nice party favor, and a new hat (that I really should return). 

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