Archive | November, 2013

Panda Onsie

15 Nov

I am 27 years old.

I now own a panda onsie.

I regularly wear said panda onsie around my apartment.

I will never grow up.

Is there really anything wrong with that? Isn’t age just a number anyway? Who wrote the rule book on what is for children and what is for adults anyway? I LOVE Disney movies, and get excited about new toys I want, and I still play on playgrounds. Whoever decided adulthood has to be boring clearly was never very passionate about much.

Yes, there are bills and deadlines and grocery shopping to do. Things stress me out…a lot…but that’s not all there is. The stress come with the responsibility of independence, but just because I am out of my mom’s house doesn’t mean I can still be her baby girl.

We force ourselves to “grow up,” taking on the mantle of responsibility and forget to dream. Adult imaginations are not that creative, I’m pretty sure it’s a scientifically proven fact, but where is the concept of staying young at heart. There is a difference between being young and being childish. Being young is finding pleasure in simple things, loving the things we love just because we love them. Being childish is not having learned the lessons that prevent us from doing stupid things. When we are children, we are learning, discovering what is good for us and what is bad for us. We need to find some things out for ourselves, but once those lessons are learned that doesn’t mean we have to cease enjoying playing in the rain because it might give us a cold, it just means we can enjoy it and then know how not to get a cold.

The panda onsie is me being young. I am young. I enjoy silly things like looking like a panda and I ALWAYS will. It is little things like the onsie or building a blanket fort that keep all the stressors in my life that are constantly playing in the back of my brain from being the only, life-consuming force in my world.

Find your panda onsie and remember to laugh, smile, run, jump, swing….life is a giant playground if you have the imagination to see it.

Plus, if you get a giraffe onsie too, you and your significant other can have weirdly exciting animal onsie sex 😉

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Updates and Unicorns (spoiler, there are no unicorns)

13 Nov

I promised this weeks ago. It’s surprisingly hard to just sit down and talk about life.

Short version, since that’s really all I have time for, but I told myself I HAD to do this today:

Work is…all of the things. I love the kids, I love how easy most days are, I love the ever-changing days, but it’s burning me out. We have discovered I am a workaholic sometimes. I have worked over 80 hours in the last two weeks and although on the whole that is above the norm, it’s not that far above. The thing about this type of position is that not many people last long with the same agency. You always have your handful of vets, then the handful of 1-2 year-ers, the rest of the holes are filled by people who stay 5-8 months and peace out.

I’ve never held a job less than a year, but I just accepted an interview for this week somewhere else and I am ok with this. It was a step back professionally taking the job here and despite the raise I just got and the kids that I love, I need to at least get the momentum back.

In the health department, I finally found a diet I can stick to and have almost lost ten pounds! This excites me and hopefully is a good motivator to find a workout routine I can keep with consistently as well. I want my definition back! Heck maybe I’ll even hop back on the running kick and work back up to that 5K I never did.

The key is to never give up. No matter how far off the trail you wander, you can always find your way back and finish climbing that mountain. Use your resources!!

LP and I continue to have our ups and downs but I think we have finally found neutral ground. I’ve let go of some of the bitterness that was getting in the way and she is making more of an effort to communicate. It helps that we are doing the diet together even though she is so skinny…that bitch.

The biggest thing that has happened in recent months is that for the first time in 5 years and 9 months I find myself in a serious relationship.

WHOA! Let’s take a second and process that for two seconds.

Now its no fairy tale and its long distance (Michigan long distance), but it is a big deal. I drop the “L” word on a daily basis and fall asleep talking to him every night. I’ll write out the whole story at some point, but despite its imperfections and mountains that sometimes seem insurmountable, he is the first guy in a long time that makes me think maybe I won’t end up alone after all. Do people really get this many chances? Or were all the other ones just the lessons I needed to learn to get here? Is this one going to turn into a lesson?

Stopping THAT crazy train right there.

That’s about it and about all the time I have to devote to this at the moment. I would like to end with something witty, or inspirational, but my brain is a little fried so we’ll have to stick to something simple.

Poop!